I was desperate for a friend, and I used to lie in bed at night thinking about what it would be like. My younger brothers and sisters had friends, and I used to watch them playing to try to work out what they did and how friendship worked.

This quote is about someone who was feeling lonely and wanting to have a friend. They used to lie in bed at night, imagining what it would be like to have a friend, and watching their younger siblings who had friends to try and learn what friendship was like and how to make friends.