I would hope it's better, but I'm actually acknowledging now that I want to explore all these levels from a whisper to a scream with this gift I've been given.

This quote means that the speaker is acknowledging that they have been given some sort of special talent or ability, and they want to use it to explore different kinds of expression, from very quiet and subtle to very loud and intense. They hope that their use of this gift will be improved, but they are accepting that they need to explore all kinds of expression levels in order to get the best out of it.